I am doing something different for this month’s blog article. I want to share seven stories of people who decided they were no longer willing to let their fear of public speaking define them.
Why tell these stories? Because most people wait far too long before doing anything about their fear. They wait until the impact on their career or personal life becomes so significant that they feel they have no choice. My hope is that these stories encourage others to act sooner. I want readers to recognise themselves in these experiences, to see that it is possible to move past a crippling fear, and to find the courage to take action.
These are all true stories. Some names and details have been changed to protect privacy, but I know every person behind these stories. Most have been clients. A shared theme runs throughout. All of them still feel some nerves. All are still improving. But none remain overwhelmed by fear in a way that restricts their lives. They now feel the fear and do it anyway.
Karen’s story
Karen traces her fear back to a single moment. At age 12 she had a panic attack during an orchestra audition. She failed the audition and carried shame about the incident for years. She never spoke about it.
Despite being warm, personable and outwardly confident, Karen chose career paths that kept her out of the spotlight. She worked in IT in roles she describes as “deskbound” and “unchallenging”. She knew she was capable of more but felt trapped by the fear.
Signing up for a Fear-less course was a turning point. For the first time she saw that she was not alone. She realised how harshly she had been judging herself and that her nerves were far more noticeable to her than to others. When she learned to focus on her message instead of on self-criticism, things began to shift.
Karen now speaks to audiences without falling apart. The fear that shadowed her life no longer controls her. Her confidence has grown across all areas of her life and she has changed career to become a primary school teacher. She says she “couldn’t be happier”. Her only regret is that she didn’t act sooner.
Hamish’s story
Hamish’s fear affected his personal life more than his career. He is a tradesman, not interested in climbing the corporate ladder, and had always seen himself as introverted. His fear surfaced at a wedding where, as groomsman, he had to read messages from absent guests. The formality paralysed him and he decided he would avoid public speaking from then on.
He managed it for years, helped by family members stepping in. But eventually avoidance became harder and he did not want to be “that person” anymore. He also felt envious of his brothers, both confident speakers, and wanted to contribute at family events rather than stay silent.
Enrolling in a Fear-less course helped him see that his fear was common and could be improved with the right tools, preparation and “baby steps”. Although still a work in progress, he now sees public speaking as much simpler than he once believed.
He now looks for opportunities to speak instead of avoiding them. Having a voice, he says, is a gift.
Melissa and Charlotte’s stories
Melissa and Charlotte do not know each other, but their experiences are strikingly similar. Both feared public speaking from childhood. Both work in marketing. Both achieved early career success and experienced imposter syndrome. Both present as confident and competent professionals whose fear would likely surprise their colleagues.
Melissa
Melissa’s fear began around age 10 when a classroom speech went badly. She felt humiliated and began to dread speaking in front of others. She avoided activities she was naturally curious about, believing public speaking was a talent others had and she lacked.
Despite early career success and leading a team in her twenties, Melissa doubted her abilities and worried about being exposed as a fraud. Her job required public speaking, and she felt intense anxiety before presentations and self-criticism afterwards.
The Fear-less course, followed by a Toastmasters programme, helped her reframe her thinking. Persistence, patience and kindness towards herself were key. Learning that many successful people, including Richard Branson and Julia Roberts, once feared public speaking normalised her experience.
Today she volunteers for speaking opportunities, focuses on what went well, and actively seeks feedback. Colleagues have commented on her improvement, many unaware she has done any training at all.
Charlotte
Charlotte can’t pinpoint exactly when her fear started, but she remembers shaking through a presentation at age eight. Attention always felt uncomfortable.
Like Melissa, Charlotte experienced imposter syndrome, especially after a promotion. Each time her manager asked to see her, she feared she was about to be told she wasn’t good enough. She now recognises how her fear of public speaking has held her back professionally.
Her breakthrough came when she saw herself on video and realised she was better than she thought. This gave her enough confidence to accumulate positive experiences. It remains a gradual process, but she can now lead workshops on topics she cares deeply about, such as wellbeing and mindfulness.
Reza’s story
Reza is a GP and entrepreneur who experienced an intense fear of public speaking despite being highly articulate. The gap between his ability and his confidence was unusually wide.
He believes his fear developed during medical training, where oral assessments often involved public questioning in front of peers and seniors. He describes these as “probing interrogations designed to put students on the spot”. His confidence plummeted and he once fainted during a teaching session, a moment he found deeply embarrassing.
The final turning point came at his own wedding. He almost fainted again during his speech. His vision narrowed, his ears rang, and he was drenched in sweat. The audience didn’t notice, and he received positive feedback, but he knew he needed help.
Reza joined Toastmasters and made enormous progress. I was lucky enough to be one of his mentors. He found it helpful to shift focus to his audience rather than his own feelings. He also cultivated mindfulness, which helped calm his intense self-doubt.
He has since delivered keynote speeches at international conferences, pitched to investors, led teams, and even won a public speaking competition. The fear is still there, he says, but now it sits at an appropriate level. This is an important reminder. Public speaking is a form of performing. Some nervousness is normal and often helpful.
Sharon’s story
Some people lose their confidence at a specific moment in adulthood. Sharon falls into this group. She had always been confident speaking under pressure. She’d taught, presented to clients, and performed well in interviews.
Then one event changed everything. She had been asked to present at the launch of a course she helped teach. She prepared strong visual material and was excited. But five minutes into the presentation her voice began shaking. Panic rose. Her legs wobbled. She clutched the podium. She finished the talk, but the experience was mortifying.
From then on, panic would strike unpredictably. She lost her professional spark, avoided opportunities, and no longer felt she could apply for roles requiring confident communication.
I remember her first phone call about the Fear-less course. She was terrified she would be the “worst person there”. On the first night she texted her husband, “I don’t want to do this. Why did I do this?” She told herself she didn’t have to return. Yet even after the first session she began to feel a shift.
She realised she was better than she had believed. She learned that we hear the shake in our own voice long before others do. She rediscovered the importance of preparation and practice. She also gained perspective. Audiences are not analysing us as closely as we imagine.
Although Sharon’s career is currently on hold for personal reasons, she now feels far more confident about stepping into challenging roles again. Like many others, she wishes she had taken action sooner.
My story
As I finished writing this article, I realised I needed to add my own story. I share this on the first night of every course to build credibility, demonstrate empathy, and model vulnerability. This is the first time I have shared it publicly.
I had mixed experiences with public speaking when I was young. Most were good, but occasionally I became intensely self-conscious. Once, while reading a poem I had written, my throat closed up so completely that I could barely make a sound.
Despite those moments, I developed into a confident speaker throughout my twenties and thirties. As a policy advisor in local government, I often led elected members through difficult decision-making.
Then I spent a decade working part-time and rarely presented. When I returned to a senior full-time role, the confidence I once had was gone. Panic waves appeared from nowhere. I sometimes felt disconnected from my own words. Once my mouth went completely dry. Another time I froze in front of the senior management team, blushed, sweated, then suddenly went cold as the blood drained from my face. In retrospect I was experiencing peri-menopause – I now realise the intense blushing I often experienced was hot flashes!
I realised I had two choices. Change careers and hide, or take action.
Joining Toastmasters changed everything. Like many of my clients, I learned that I had been far too harsh on myself. I discovered that solid preparation made an enormous difference. Techniques like pausing and eye contact helped me appear more confident than I felt, until eventually my confidence caught up.
For years I still had occasional panic moments, but I learned I could let the wave pass through me without anyone noticing. That knowledge alone reduced the fear.
Fear-less Public Speaking exists because I know how common this fear is, how much it can reduce with the right support, and how life-changing the results can be. I am grateful to everyone who has shared their stories so candidly. They remind me why I do this work.
